Chapter 20

I glanced at the door again. It’s not time yet, I sighed and leaned back. Cindy and Gail were standing around. Cindy was leaning against the wall next to the doctor’s door and Gail sat next to me with a sigh. She reached for my hand and I held hers in mine. When I found the test, these girls were the first I approached, not even Tom knows I’m right here with them.

“How could this happened?” I asked quietly as I looked up at Cindy.

“Sometimes protection fails” Gail answered just as quietly.

“How do you think this news will hit him?” Cindy asked, lifting her body from the wall.

“I dunno. Probably he would be shocked” Gail looked at us repeatedly.

I just kept silent and smiled a little.

“Well, the test says positive but we can’t be sure right?” I looked at them with hope.

The door opened and a nurse approached us.

“ Miss, it’s your turn”

We stood up and a rush of nervousness swept me off my feet.

“No matter what, we will face it together ok” Cindy approached us as the three of us hugged.

“It will be okay” Tom nodded encouragingly.

We were sitting at home in the living room, sipping coffee except me. I could stand the smell of coffee but the taste is just so nauseating so I was biting on a snack bar. Recently I had started to snack more on healthy food. I don’t get dizzy anymore. Cindy and Gail were sitting opposite us, both of them looked equally worried. I reached out and pulled an ultrasound photo from the table. I wasn’t sure if he was allowed to see this but a glance at Gail who nodded her approval and I handed it to Tom.

“Wow, it’s so tiny” he wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

I could feel that Tom was appreciating the black and white photo he held in his hand. Suddenly I heard Sarah’s door opened and instantly I pulled the photo from Tom’s hand and hid it behind me. Sarah came out wearing a red dress and Dylan was right behind her, dressed handsomely in shirt.

“Where ya going?” Cindy asked.

“Bringing my lady to a lobster dinner tonight” Dylan smiled.

“K, you kids have fun. Don’t come back too late. Drive safe” I grinned and waved from my seat.

“Oh sis, I wanna borrow a bit of your powder” he smiled and went into my bathroom.

“Floral scent, very manly” I rolled my eyes playfully.

Gail was looking at the newspaper and Cindy was filing her nails. Sarah was just standing there, waiting for Dylan and peeking at my boyfriend. Grr .. thankfully Tom seems to be engrossed in his schedule for tomorrow. I sneaked a peek at my boyfriend who was looking at his organizer.

That is my Tom, always so organized and tidy. How his eyes were scanning through the dates. I loved how his fringe had been spiked up a little. His lips were muttering something but I guessed it must be some reminder from the organizer. I studied Tom for a minute right before my concentration was interrupted by loud stomping noise coming from my bedroom. Dylan appeared before us and he was really angry. I could tell when my brother is pissed. His ears turned red when he gets really pissed and in my whole life, he had only been that pissed with me twice.

“What the hell is this?” he flung his arm and something landed with a thud on the table.

Uh oh. The test.

“Ge, this is ..” I stood up.

“YOU! You bastard! The nerve of you to knocked up my sister!”

Dylan grabbed Tom by the collar.

“Dylan, listen. It’s not ..” Tom tried to break free from his grip.

“Ge, I’m not pregnant” I shook my head.

“But I saw Tom sneaking off early one morning” Sarah added in innocently.

Yeah right, innocent my ass. Bitch! Why is she adding oil to fire?

“You still touched my sister!” Dylan barked.

I think he meant “touch my sister naked”. Gah, my brother can be so dramatic sometimes. I sat down on the sofa.

“He .. we never touch each other okay? The test is not mine and I’m not pregnant”

“What?” his grip on Tom loosened and Tom freed himself.

“Seriously Dylan, we are innocent” Tom let out a sigh.

“Then whose is this?” Dylan asked again.

I looked all around the room. My two girls sitting across me were looking back at me, Tom was holding my hand, Sarah and Dylan were looking at me like they want an explanation.

“Lisa? Whose test is this?” Dylan asked, his voice slightly softer now.

Finally Gail stood up and told him “ Dylan, it’s mine”

I felt bad for Gail. Not only does that she have to tell the father of the child, now she had to confess everything to us openly in front of everyone, including Sarah. When I found the pregnancy test, I had been thinking it all over. Who do this test belong to?

“You guys, I found this in the trash in my bathroom” I held the test with a tissue.

Cindy and Gail looked at me and sat there for a moment before Cindy spoke first.

“You’re pregnant?” Cindy stood up and hugged me tightly.

“Thanks for the hug but no, it’s not mine” I pushed her away gently.

“Is it Sarah’s ?” Cindy’s voice dropped to a whisper.

My eyes widen “ I hope not. If it is, then I’m forever tied to her by blood”

“Who says the baby is Dylan’s?” Cindy teased cheekily.

Gail had been quiet and we turned to her.

“Whose baby do you think Sarah is carrying?” Cindy asked.

“The test is mine” Gail said steadily.

“Who is the father?” Dylan asked.

Now that’s a sensitive question. When we asked Gail about it, she couldn’t even tell us. I think she might need some time to think things through before revealing to us who it is. Dylan should not have asked that question.

“Ge..” I tried to tell him to back off.

“It’s Neil, that guy from work” Gail answered, looking straight at Dylan.

Dylan’s face softened. HAH! I bet now he feel pretty silly for accusing me and Tom earlier.

“Neil?” Cindy repeated.

“Yeah, Neil” Gail looked away.

I was sitting in Jay’s studio with Vincent as he was in the recording studio, trying to record the demo for his song, White Windmill which was inspired by me. When I entered the studio, he was already in the recording room singing. He acknowledged me with a small smile. I realized Jay looked tired, due to the preparation of his new album.

“Am I disturbing?” I asked Vincent.

He shook his head and I took my seat next to him.

“You know, this is one of Jay’s best work” Vincent explained.

“Has he started filming the mv yet?” I asked.

Vincent shook his head and we turned our attention back to Jay. He wore a white t shirt with the word “Everyone wants peaces and maney ”. Okay, I made a mental note, must buy Jay shirt with proper English. I love the way Jay’s hands moved around when he gets into the mood of the song.

It’s like he’s expressing his emotions and how he is moved by the song. Before I knew it, I was singing along with the lyric sheet in my hand.

Within 20 minutes, Jay came out of the recording room and had a gulp of water.

“Vince, you can go downstairs first. I’ll join you in a while”

Vincent smiled with a nod and went downstairs. Jay sat down next to me with a smile.

“My mom asked you over for dinner , I assumed”

I nodded “ I have to turn down my brother’s offer to cook dinner together so that I can come over to see you guys” I grinned.

“Been busy with boyfriend eh?” he smiled.

I blushed. Does Jay know? Did Tom tell him?

“Yes, I know. You have been seeing Tom. Why didn’t you tell me?”

He didn’t look angry or sad. Instead he looked sort of amused and curious, looking at me from the side, wondering what my answer would be.

“At first we just wanted the rumour to die down because everyone had suspecting about me and you, then Tom stepped in so that it seemed like I was going out with him and not you. I don’t know when I start liking him but I think the whole thing started from then” I smiled.

“He was the boyfriend you mentioned in the Loreal photo shoot, right?”

“I guess so. That was ages ago. How did you find out?”

“These things cannot be kept a secret. I felt it, when you guys are in the same room together, I knew he was attracted to you, I just didn’t know you guys are going out”

“I’m sorry we kept it a secret from you. I dunno why we never told you either” I blurted out

“Lis, we’re friends. You can tell me anything. I know we didn’t have a good start in the beginning but I am sure we are much better off now right? I might be busy, I might be unavailable but you can call me anytime to tell me anything” he smiled.

I nodded with a sudden comfort, knowing that Jay would be there for me no matter what.

“Come on, let’s go. My mom says she’s cooking tonight” we stood up and he led me out of the studio.

I adjusted the web cam to a better angle, then I spoke into the mic which was on the stand right beside my keyboard.

“Better now?” I asked.

Jay gave me a thumb up; I could see it from his web cam. It’s been two days since dinner at his place and tonight I made myself free because Jay needed me to help him with some document handling.

“So you were saying that Gail is pregnant?” he said.

Okay, so we have also been gossiping but Jay promised he would keep my secrets. Besides he had been telling me some things too.

“Yeah, I’m not sure if she told the father yet. I found the test and my brother thought it was mine. He blew up and almost wanted to beat Tom up”

Jay grinned. He looked good when he’s happy and stress free, just like this. Casual conversation and a cup of tea made him relax, he confessed.

“I understand where your brother was coming from. I think if I had a younger sister, I would have done the same thing” he bobbed his head repeatedly.

Tom kissed me again after he locked my door.

“I don’t want Sarah or your brother to walk in and disturb us” he whispered.

I smiled. How could I forget this man? As I ran my fingers through his hair and his face again, he nibbled on my ear. I could feel his hot breath near my ear. I felt excited and my fingers trailed slowly to his shirt. Tom kissed my hand, kissing each finger and I let myself drowned in ecstasy.

“Do you want to?” the question was thrown to me.

My eyes opened and I looked at Tom, the man who is looking down on me. I stopped and my mind raced. Do I love him? Gosh, I do. I really do but do I want this?

“I’m not ready” I let go of his hand.

I could sensed a little disappointment in his eyes but he smiled at me and sat up properly.

“Do you hate me?” I bit my bottom lip as I pulled myself up to face him.

“No, I don’t want to force you. We should both be ready okay?” he kissed the top of my head gently.

“Lis?? Lis?? Are you okay?”

I broke off from my thoughts. Jay was waving from the web cam, his eyes wide and concerned.

“Yeah, I’m here. What were you saying?” I focused back on our conversation.

He chuckled “So how is she going to handle the baby? Is she going to keep it or abort it?”

“Come to think of it, I never asked her”

I decided now would be the best time to ask her, least if I forget about it again later. I put Jay on hold and walked to Gail’s closed door. I raised my fist to knock but before I could, I heard voices inside. It was Gail’s and another guy. Perhaps that’s Neil. I shall ask her later then. If she chooses abortion, I am going all out to try to stop her. I don’t believe in taking the baby’s life due to the parent’s mistake

Do you know what is way cuter than Tom sleeping like a baby? Tom sleeping like a baby with my pillow. It made him look less of a macho man and more like a sweetheart.

“You want me to be feminine eh?” he smiled when he woke up.

“What? It’s not my fault that you like my pillow so much you hug it to sleep” I grinned.

Tom ran his fingers through his hair and he eyed my floor then he got up and started to pick things up. My bag, a few of my clothes and some hangers.

“Dear, I’ll do it later k” I glanced up from my laptop.

“No, you won’t. You’re a messy little piggy. Since I’m here, let me do it for you”

Recently I got a job as an assistant to a magazine editor, meaning I do work for her. Due to my job and Tom’s work time, we have been seeing lest of each other. That is why we treasure each moment together, like right now. Even though I’m busy preparing a report for Maggie, my boss, I still let Tom come over because as long as he is around, we can sneak 5 minutes or so for ourselves.

“I went to the orphanage the other day. The kids were asking for Lisa jie jie”

“Really? You are not bluffing right?” I turned to him.

It made me happy to know that they were asking for me. It felt good to be able to make an impact in their lives since they don’t have any family member to depend on.

“Why would I wanna lie? So, do you wanna go back there and see them?”

“I would. Just set a date and tell me, I will arrange my time. I bought them stuff too. Well, actually I haven’t decide what to get the boys yet”

“I didn’t know you are so tentative to children” he looked quite surprised.

“I didn’t know either. Oh yeah, Gail asked me to be her baby’s god mother” I clapped my hands together with glee.

Actually, me and Cindy both were asked. Finally Gail told us she is keeping the baby, she had talked to the father of the baby and we were to be god mothers. Although we were happy that she made her decision, we couldn’t help but to worry for her too. I could see it at that moment when Gail announced her decisions to us, there was something she is not telling but I don’t want to push it. Let her come to term with things her own time.

“So Gail is keeping the baby then?”

I nodded and turned back to my work. Not even 5 minutes later, Tom had pulled a chair right beside me. He sat there looking at me and I had to turn to look at him.

“What is it?” I wondered.

“Our 9 months anniversary is coming up. How do you wanna celebrate it?”

“Hmm.. how did we celebrate our 1st anniversary?” I asked.

“The first one was kinda grand, remember? Balloons and candles ..” Tom recalled.

“Tian Zhi, you pick what kind of anniversary you like, I’ll be fine with it” I touched his face briefly to let him know I cared but at the same time, I’m busy with the report deadline.

“Ting, you work too hard. Come on, 5 minutes break” he stood up.

“But I have ..” I couldn’t finish protesting.

Tom kissed me, took my breath away and work was out of my mind.

Bill, advertisement, bill, catalogue .. letter?

My name was written in front and I opened the envelope carefully. Inside was a letter, with the watermark of JVR music as a background. My heart softened when I saw it. Jay.


I knew I had treated you badly in the past. I know you must be hurt by my actions. For that, I am deeply sorry. Over the past few months, I have come to know you as a person and as a friend. I seen how you and my mom get along, she seems happier now that she has someone to share her stories with. You’re like the daughter she never had. I know that you would be around for a while, therefore I decided that instead of suspecting you, I would get to know you better. I liked what I saw in you, a compassionate, outspoken happy woman whom lit up a room with your presence. I saw that you were vulnerable and scared at the same time, of us, of the new environment and exposure from the media that you get. Still, above all, I am grateful that you became a friend to me.

Throughout this friendship, ever since the Loreal commercial shoot, I felt like my feelings towards you have changed. I felt much more protective of you and when you smiled, I felt like I could do anything. Maybe I had a crush on you. I guessed I should have told you sooner but now that you are with Tom, I cannot say anything. Don’t get me wrong, Tom is one of my best friend and you are lucky to have a guy like him. His heart was wild and untamed. You entered his life and cleared the rumours that had been hanging around.

I am not trying to put you in a difficult position Lisa, trust me, I never intent to. I just want to let you know that you mean a lot to me and you are special. When you were in the studio the other day, I wanted to tell you all this but I was afraid you might think I’m insane or you might walk out mid way. It would have hurt so badly. The next time you see me, just pretend you never even seen this letter. I don’t want to make things awkward between us but I just got to let you know, I am a friend who will wipe your tears away when you cry

Sincerely, Jie Lun

I grabbed my keys and ran out of my apartment. I started my Toyota and drove all the way to Jay’s place. Mid way, tears poured down my face. I felt so touched, so moved. When I pulled up on his driveway, I wiped my tears. I must have looked silly, wearing a green dress with my hair done and my make up on, 2 hours into celebrating my anniversary and I’m sobbing.

When the door opened, I ran past the butler and straight into the studio. There he was, sitting on the table with the lyrics sheet.

“Hey Lisa!” he smiled and jumped down the table.

I hugged him with gratitude. Tears formed at the corner of my eyes again as Jay recovered from his surprise and hugged me back.

“What’s going on?” he asked softly.

“Thank you for being my friend” I smiled through my tears.

“You’re more than welcome” he smiled back and patted my back.

Suddenly my phone rang.

“Hello Lisa. I’m Gail’s baby father. I need to talk to you”

“What? How ..”

“Meet me at the cafe now, please”

Then the line went dead.I looked at Jay and he looked equally concerned.

“How did it happen?” I asked after I recovered from my shock.

“It happened two months ago, right after I took a shower. We just started talking, we got along, had some wine and things heated up”

“Do you even like her?” I asked first, the most crucial question.

“I won’t lie to you. I am attracted to her. It’s wrong but I am” he shrugged.

“So did you talk to Gail about it? She told you she wanna keep the baby. Is she doing it alone or what?”

Seriously, I feel like punching his head if he says he is not going to be responsible.

“I let her keep it but do you think we should opt to abort it?” he cringed as if he’s expecting me to stand up and slap him, which I thought would be a bit too dramatic but probably necessary.

“You can’t do that! Imagine if I had been the one who got pregnant, I wouldn’t want my boyfriend to tell me to get rid of the baby. I would rather get rid of him first”

Would I? The words escaped my lips before I had a chance to think. He seemed to ponder for a while.

“You’re right. Now this is my responsibility too”

“How?” I asked, stirring my orange juice.

“I have a girlfriend. What should I do?”

It was my turn to cringe. “You’re asking me what is the right thing to do with my best friend. You knocked her up, you have no choice now but to break your girlfriend’s heart”I said coldly.

Sounds cruel but hey, I can’t leave poor pregnant Gail all alone while he still goes around with that woman right? He sighed and leaned back, looking like a man who is forced to the dead end, which is true. I forbid abortion and I will make sure Gail have this baby, not alone.

“How was it?” I leaned forward.

“How was what?”

I bobbed my head a little “You know, the process of .. ”

“Lisa!” he looked horrified.

“What? I’m curious. Was it good?” I grinned.

He bowed his head lower “It was pretty amazing, actually” then he avoided my stare.

I giggled and gagged at the same time. He looked kinda offended.

“Why am I sitting here discussing my sex life with you?”

“Hey, you called me out” I pointed a finger at him accusingly.

“Yeah, you’re right. Just because I know you can talk some sense into me”

“Hey, I thought Gail slept with ..” I asked.

“No, I’m the father, confirmed” he wagged his finger.

Then he kissed my cheek “Thank you”

“Always welcome”

I watched as he walked away. I’m still in shock though. I took another two sips of my orange juice and got up. I walked back to my car. Just in time to head back to the Jay mansion to meet up with Tom. As I walked towards the car, I couldn’t help it but my lips curled into a smile.

“I’m going to be an aunt” I finally let reality sink in.